maybe this is all i have
Oct. 4th, 2010 08:32 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ella_mennoYou know what I hate? I'll tell you.
I hate getting all excited about writing (ohmigod, I'm writing again, haven't done it in so long and it feels so good), being absolutely possessed with an idea - wallowing in it, making notes, jotting down sentences/words/phrases and feeling so, so, so good about the acct of creating...
...and then coming down off that high. I wish I wasn't such a feedback whore - if nobody's going to read it, I lose all motivation to write.
Why can't I write for *me*? Why am *I* not a good enough reason, to me, to finish? Why don't I let myself have this?
It's normal to want to share the things we create, I suppose. I'd have no problem sharing this, either, if anyone was interested in reading fanfic about fanfic. It's not bad to want to share, to enjoy the process of sharing - but it feels bad to *need* that external validation in order to get off my ass and finish.
Argh.
I hate getting all excited about writing (ohmigod, I'm writing again, haven't done it in so long and it feels so good), being absolutely possessed with an idea - wallowing in it, making notes, jotting down sentences/words/phrases and feeling so, so, so good about the acct of creating...
...and then coming down off that high. I wish I wasn't such a feedback whore - if nobody's going to read it, I lose all motivation to write.
Why can't I write for *me*? Why am *I* not a good enough reason, to me, to finish? Why don't I let myself have this?
It's normal to want to share the things we create, I suppose. I'd have no problem sharing this, either, if anyone was interested in reading fanfic about fanfic. It's not bad to want to share, to enjoy the process of sharing - but it feels bad to *need* that external validation in order to get off my ass and finish.
Argh.
